


Flawed Happiness

by HerbertBest



Series: Two Lonely People [6]
Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Complicated Relationships, Consensual Infidelity, Coping, Cuddling & Snuggling, Depression, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-05
Updated: 2016-09-05
Packaged: 2018-08-13 04:32:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7962577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HerbertBest/pseuds/HerbertBest
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s everything they wanted.  But why is it so difficult?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Flawed Happiness

The first time it happened she collapsed. The room was small and echoed with emptiness and she would sit alone, staring at the ceiling, soaking in the scent of her own unwashed skin. 

Ross knew what to do for her when it happened. 

He would sit with her and talk until the pills kicked in and her mood lightened. He was the one who could make her smile in two seconds, who could let her be sad. On days when even he couldn’t lift her out of the darkness his soothing presence was a blessing.

This was the first time, though that it had happened because of something he’d done. 

Even still, he sat beside her for hours. If it didn’t feel the same to him he never let on. And Holly, floating in the elixir of her emotional pain, dragged down into unconsciousness with his arm wrapped around her middle.

*** 

Ross loved her. 

Still. Even in light of his inability to balance the love he also had for Barry. Even after choosing to go to Vegas with Barry for a convention instead of helping her shoot something at PAX West. Holly had bottled it all up, stowed all that pain away, until she collapsed into another bout of depression. He felt nothing but guilt. Why hadn’t she told him to stay?

The pull of being stuck between them felt frightening. He almost wanted to run out on the entire situation. But, he supposed with a groan, there were alternatives.

He sighed and found Dan’s name in his contact list.

*** 

This was Dan’s dream. He should be thrilled.

Only his dream had strings and complications attached to it. No one had told him to expect the screaming, pushing hordes of teenagers. No one told him to expect the sense of isolation, the slow dissolution of his normal life, the loss of privacy. And no one told him how heavy the weight of their secrets, their pain, would weigh on his shoulders.

He was stupid to complain, even silently, to himself, where no one could hear him. He’d suffered intensely for this bit of success. So…

So he hid alone in his house, in a room, with the blinds drawn. This, he though, is why Michael Jackson and Elvis lived nocturnally. He decompressed in the silence of his empty house, reminded of his youth, the circular thinking that kept him high and alone for days. In thinking of nothing, being purposeless for once, he felt useless and empty as a busted balloon. 

Why was he sitting there alone? And why, obsessively, did he mind turn back toward the sanctity of his night with Holly, an oasis of pleasure in a difficult time?

The phone rang, Ross’ number glowing up at him from the dial.

It took a massive effort to answer it.

*** 

Her bedroom door creaked open. “Hol?” Dan’s voice was quiet and patient. “Ross asked me to come. His flight just left. He said you’re having a terrible day?”

Her nod was barely perceptible. 

“Okay,” he said quietly. Entering, he sat down at the edge of the bed. His shoes came off, and he turned toward her prone form. “Can I hold you?”

She nodded, once more. Her arms were open when he squirmed, still dressed, under the covers. 

If they needed to be sad, confused and conflicted, Dan reasoned, it was better to be sad together.


End file.
